DEALING WITH PERFECTIONIST PROBLEMS

Perfectionist problems in terms of perfectionism is simply a dislike to anything less than perfection (the quality or state of being complete or perfect, so that nothing requisite is wanting); the highest attainable state or degree of excellence in arts, science or in a system.

Perfectionists tend to be capable people but they impose upon themselves (and often upon others) very high standards. They are unable to set up priorities because, in their mind, everything is important and must be done with exacting precision. In essence the difficulty-to-reach high aims cause the corresponding feeling of failure and frustration.

Perfectionists are most focused on avoiding failure and they don’t believe in unconditional love, they don’t expect other’s love and approval to be dependent of a performance that seems impeccable.

According to Psychology Today, perfectionism is primary driven by internal pressures such as the desire to avoid failure and perfectionist tendencies have increased tremendously among youngsters.

Also See: How To Overcome Shyness 

 There are two kinds of perfectionism; they are incapacitating and adaptive. Incapacitating carries with it several complications and is a barrier to the attainment of goals because the person uses this natural tendency to do things thoroughly, and to advance personally or professionally. Also, even adaptive perfectionism has its risks.

The perfectionists Problems:

• Set up unrealistic goals
• Are unable to attain the goals because they are very difficult
• Fail, causing effectiveness and productivity to decrease
• Condemn themselves for the failure.

Again, set up new aims with the purpose of reaching them this time; and then the cycle repeats. Therefore, perfectionism can become a vicious cycle.

When one becomes a perfectionist, there seems to be negative outcomes like nearness to avoiding challenges, procrastination

How to prevent and overcome Perfectionist Problems

Eliminate fear of failure: Everybody makes mistakes. We learn from our mistakes.

Eliminate fear of rejection or disapproval. Believing that one needs continual acceptance by and approval of others is one of the most dangerous and irrational thoughts.

 Eliminate the “all or nothing” idea. Being close to the maximum goal is an important achievement and does not constitute failure

Eliminate the excess of rules.

Perfectionism is also a barrier in social relations. This problem encompasses not only family, friends and work but also the therapeutic dimension (relationship with the psychologist).

Remember: Striving for perfection has been the downfall of many of us over the years, as it is impossible to do everything right all of the time.

Romans 3:10 “as it is written: “None is righteous, no, not one;”

Matthew 6:33 “But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.”

Instead of striving for flawlessness and perfection in our own lives, we should seek God’s Kingdom and his righteousness first. This will help establish the right priorities in our lives, and it will keep our focus centered on the Lord. Getting distracted with our own desires and ambitions will only get us in trouble.

Read also:

Barriers In Relationships

Bulimia Nervosa

Overcoming Loneliness

Anxiety and an Anxiety disorder

Narcissism And How To Overcome it